Last

I was last and by the time I got there you were spent.
"It is meaningless to love anymore, Love".
You said.
We are just so fucking clever now, aren't we?

You could always do that.
Make me feel so small with the turning of a phrase.
Standing before you or dropping to my knees.
Weak, just so fucking weak.

I bow to you.
Lower my head, shallow my breath.
Quiet as a mouse.
Screams come with a price.

A tongue lashing.
Verbal, physical.
Wet.
My face, below.

"Lust is a sin".
Not "a" sin.
But my sin.
Between my legs, your redemption.

Take it away from yourself.
Put it into me.
I was helpless, lost.
Looking up for God, finding only you.

Walk away.
Show me your back.
Like you make me give you mine.
Stop and stare first.

All you see.
Hollow, isn't it?
This "Love".
Both shallow and full of pride.

Fill me again with your left overs.
Hate me like I hate you.
I am your fuck.
In terms of sex, in terms of a cunt.

Shocking.
I am just so terrible.
I am filth, I am disease, I am a child.
Give me my sin again.

This time I will be strength.
I will be your sinful pride come to life.
I will show you revenge.
I will seek and find my glory.

In the shape of a razor.
In the twist of a knife.
In the screams that escape your tortured soul.
I am letting go.

You were the sin all along.
It's over now, you are gone.
This is why I waited.
To be your last.